Category Archives: Money

The 5 Biggest Areas of Conflict for Couples

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The 5 Biggest Areas of Conflict for Couples

Drs. Les and Leslie Parrott

BY DRS. LES AND LESLIE PARROTT 
MAY 13, 2013

 

Drs. Les and Leslie Parrott are #1 New York Times best-selling authors of numerous books, includingLove Talk and the award-winning Saving Your Marriage Before It Starts. Their new book The Good Fight: How Conflict Can Bring You Closer releasesApril 22 from Worthy Publishing. VisitLesAndLeslie.com.

 

Conflict is inevitable in marriage, but here’s how to fight well.
One of the most common misconceptions in marriages today is that fighting is a sign of an unhealthy relationship. But is it? Is a healthy marriage really one completely absent of conflict?

As a psychologist (Les) and a marriage and family therapist (Leslie), married since 1984, we don’t claim to have a perfect relationship. We fight—just like every other couple on the planet. But we’ve learned a secret:  There’s a difference between a bad fight and a good fight.

And when a couple learns to fight a good fight, the conflict actually brings them closer.

WE’VE LEARNED A SECRET:  THERE’S A DIFFERENCE BETWEEN A BAD FIGHT AND A GOOD FIGHT.

 

All couples generally fight over the same five things: money, sex, work, parenting and housework. Most argue about these five issues over and over again because these are all stressors that speak to our sense of love and fairness.

But you can learn to fight about them in a healthy way. Here are some tools to help you cool down “The Big Five.”

Money

Allow us to say it straight: Money fights between couples are rarely about money. So if you want to minimize a currency conflict, trace it back to the fear that’s fueling it.

Instead of fighting over the amount of money that was spent on who-knows-what, shift the focus toward what really matters: (1) your fear of not having influence in important issues impacting your life, (2) your fear of not having security in your future, (3) your fear of having no respect shown for your values, or (4) your fear of not realizing your dreams.

Sex

To keep sexual grievances down and the marital bedsprings bouncing, we recommend focusing on solving “coordination failure.” It’s a common problem in marriages. The number-one reason people report not having sex in their marriage is “Too tired,” followed closely by “Not in the mood.” Most of the time, that’s code, knowingly or not, for having mismatched sex drives.

So start talking about it. As we write this, we can almost feel you cringing. For most couples, talking about sex is about as comfortable as sleeping in a car. Yet it’s a conversation that’s critically important to aligning your libidos and minimizing your conflicts. When the time is right, when both of you are relaxed and not distracted, ask each other to explain when you feel most eager to head to bed. Your answers may surprise you.

Work

 

We’ve got two words for you: date night. We know. You’ve heard this a thousand times: do a weekly date night or your marriage will suffer. Sounds more like a threat than friendly advice, doesn’t it? But it’s a surefire way to keep career conflict to a minimum.

MARRIAGE IS LIVED BEST WHEN YOU’RE NOT TRYING TO BALANCE THE SCALES.

 

In spite of this frequent advice, the message doesn’t seem to be getting through. Here’s how often married people, aged 25 to 50 with two or more children, have a date night:

  • Once a week: 4 percent
  • Once a month: 21 percent
  • Once every two to three months: 21 percent
  • Once every four to six months: 18 percent
  • Once every seven months or less often: 36 percent

Yikes! We can do better than that, and there’s good reason to do it. The National Marriage Project at the University of Virginia recently released a report titled “The Date Night Opportunity.” This study found that husbands and wives who set aside a deliberate time to connect and have fun at least once a week were approximately three and a half times more likely to report being “very happy” in their marriages.

Children

The solution for nearly any parenting conflict is found in getting on the same page and presenting a unified front. Otherwise, your kids play you against each other and add fuel to the parenting fire. Conflict decreases as teamwork increases. It may not be easy to agree with your spouse on the rules and standards you are willing to enforce with your kids. That’s why the first order of business is to iron out differences behind closed doors.

Don’t try to solve your parenting squabbles in the moment—while the kids enjoy the show. The time for presenting your ideas and negotiating trade-offs is when the two of you are alone. Once you reach agreement, stick together. When parents present a united front, there’s no room for recriminating I-told-you-so’s.

Chores

Let’s face it—most housework fights come about because one spouse is keeping score. That’s a bad idea. The scales of marriage are always in flux, and you’re only setting yourselves up for turmoil if you’ve installed a figurative scoreboard in your relationship. Using the division of labor approach does away with all that.

Trina, for example, is better and faster than Dan at both doing the dishes and tidying up around the house. In fact, she does it in half the time it takes him. Given this fact, does it make sense for Dan to do either of these tasks? Not really. What does make sense is for Dan to refresh the water bowl for their pet and prepare their child’s room for bedtime. He’s also quicker at organizing and tracking their finances. He does it in half the time it would take Trina. He’s also pretty good at ironing his own shirts.

You get the idea. It’s simple. Quit trying to divide the household chores down the middle. Marriage is lived best when you’re not trying to balance the scales.

Conflict is a fact of life, but it doesn’t have to be a bad one. When you are your spouse hit up against it next—and you will—go ahead and fight it out, but fight it with the goal to grow closer, to understand him or her better and to love each other well even in the midst of disagreement.

Adapted with permission from The Good Fight by Drs. Les & Leslie Parrott © 2013. Published by Worthy Publishing, a division of Worthy Media, Inc., Brentwood, TN. 

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God and Money – It’s Easier to Talk about Gay Marriage than Money for 20-30 year olds…

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shel – I come from a selfish generation that wants to feel good but contribute little.  It’s Easier to Talk about Gay Marriage than Money for 20-30 year olds in Sioux Falls.  But  I absolutely believe in giving 10% of my income to the local church I am spiritual family with.  In the OT the people gave in some years 30%+ of income to various support and 10%/first fruits to the ministry of the levites.  In the NT the principle is grace-based but no where are we called to give less! Paul teaches the ministers are worthy of their wage and also collects alms for disaster relief.  Jesus is more challenging with using our resources for ministry.

Anne & I not only tithe before we even pay the mortgage, we also give alms, to special funds, etc.  BUT that is NEVER the 10% it is offering or alms-giving above that.  10% goes to the church we are part of as an act of worship to God.

Here is a great article on the subject:

When your bank account is empty and debts are mounting, how do you get your finances under control?

By Glen D. Cole

I read the fine print on my MasterCard: “This card belongs to Crocker National Bank.”

I thought: That’s it. Today many belong to Crocker National Bank, Wells Fargo Bank or Bank of America. When they have a financial crisis, they look to their MasterCard rather than to their Master. When they do not have enough money to buy certain material objects, they whip out the plastic card. They think they have solved their money woes, only to plunge into financial devastation.

Proverbs 22:7 says, “The rich ruleth over the poor, and the borrower is servant to the lender.” This suggests that the borrower is selling his or her soul to the lender — which, more often than not, is a credit card company or bank. The misuse of credit cards is a major problem in financial disasters, but the primary problem is a spiritual one.

Here are five suggestions for giving the Master charge of your finances:

1. Pay your tithes and give your offerings. Malachi 3:8,9 says the one who refuses to pay tithes and give offerings has robbed God.

One-tenth of our earnings belongs to God. Jesus told the Pharisees: “For you pay tithe of mint and anise and cummin, and have neglected the weightier matters of the law: justice and mercy and faith. These you ought to have done, without leaving the others undone” (Matthew 23:23, NKJV). The New Testament message is one of stewardship: Everything belongs to God and we are to manage wisely what He puts in our care.

Many are having difficulties in their marriages and with their children because they are suffering the consequences of their decision to steal from God. When we give our tithes and offerings to Him, we give Him what He is due. A person who tithes says to God, “I am dependent on You. I am putting my faith in You to help me govern my affairs.”

2. Do not borrow money you cannot afford to pay back. According to God’s Word, you are a servant under bondage until your debt is paid. This is not to suggest that every person who owes on a mortgage, for example, is under bondage. The key here is that you pay that debt every month. If you do, the bank or lender cannot demand you surrender your house. There is nothing wrong with borrowing as long as you can afford to pay it back.

Some say they want to tithe, but they can’t start yet because they’re too much in debt. In other words, they stole from God to pay their creditors. I would prefer to have my accounts straight with Him and be in arrears with others. When I am straight with Him, God has ways to meet those financial obligations.

3. Use credit cards sparingly. The bill should be paid in full every 30 days. If you have lost the ability to control your credit cards, cut every card right down the middle.

4. Do not write checks when the money is not in the bank. If you overdraw your account, the bank will transfer the overdraft to a loan account with a high interest rate. Employing overdraft protection is a poor habit, and writing checks that cannot be honored by the bank is not pleasing to God.

5. Buy wisely. When you face a significant purchase, ask: Will this purchase please God? Is it reasonable? Is it on sale?

If stores are going to have sales, I am going to wait for them. There are times to buy, and there are times not to buy.

By applying these five principles, you will be well on your way to putting the Master in charge of your finances.

Glen D. Cole is superintendent of the Northern California—Nevada District of the Assemblies of God.

.._______________________________________

From our controversial Issues statement:

Do you believe in Tithing?
In the Old Testament book of Genesis, chapter 14, Abraham personified the spirit of giving that is taught in both the Old and New Testaments. We have come to refer to this spirit or attitude toward giving as the “spirit of the tithe,” and it is characterized by the following: 

  1.  a belief that everything I have belongs to God.
Abraham said, “Lord God most high, possessor of heaven and earth, everything I have belongs to you….” In this spirit, Abraham gave a tenth of what he had to the Lord because a tenth in that culture was symbolic of the whole. The Scripture teaches that we are caretakers of the earth and its resources which belong to God, and we will be held accountable for how we use these gifts. 


In the Old Testament God required the Israelites to give a considerable amount, much of it  the first fruits of their harvest, to symbolize their gratitude, their dependence, and their trust  in Him to provide for them. This discipline of giving was designed to keep their devotion  centered on God as their loving provider, rather than on the material things themselves which lead to idolatry and greed. This required giving was also the means by which the needs of the people as a nation were provided for. 

In the New Testament this principle of giving remains the same. The parables of Jesus repeatedly illustrate that we are not owners but stewards and heirs, entrusted with the resources of the kingdom of God. We will be held accountable for how we manage these gifts.

The discipline of giving continues to keep our focus on God as our loving provider and our only hope both spiritually and physically, and breaks the bondage of materialism (idolatry) and greed. The discipline of giving a tithe is not for God’s benefit, but for ours. God has need of nothing, but he wants us to be in relationship with Him and with others. Giving generously and sacrificially reconnects us to our dependence on God and His gifts to us; it also connects us with the needs and lives of others.

In the New Testament, the discipline of giving is also the means through which the needs of the people in the community of faith are met. We are commanded to care and provide for one another, for our spiritual leaders, and for the poor. What is not needed to provide and care for our families is to be used to provide for and minister to the needs of others, the church, and the advancement of the kingdom of God.

This belief has practical applications for how we live as believers. First, we must endeavor to live simply, and without debt as much as possible so that we are free to give and to go where God calls us. Second, we give, not only of our money, but also of our time, our talents, our expertise, our bodily strength and energy in service to God, who gave all of Himself to us. Third, we give priority in giving to the church as the community or family that cares for us, like we care for our own families, and we give to other organizations and individuals seeking to minister to the needs of others so that the sacrificial giving message of the Gospel is
declared in both word and deed. Fourth, a very practical, legitimate, biblical way to affirm and maintain this “spirit of the tithe” is to tithe – to give a tenth as a symbol of the whole.

  2.  a celebratory attitude of gratitude.
As Romans 12:1 instructs, we give everything we have – our very selves – in response to the great mercy and love of God which He pours out on us in Jesus Christ. For a believer the act of giving is one of deep thanksgiving and praise. It is an acknowledgment and celebration  of our dependent relationship with God and his generous and extravagant provision. It is an expression of our faith and an act of worship.

The Assemblies of God also has a great statement on tithing worth exploring.  It’s comes down to a heart attitude regarding the value of the local church, the idolatry of control of money and spiritual discipline: http://ag.org/top/Beliefs/topics/gendoct_06_tithing.cfm 

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Ed Stetzer: Cultural and Religious Research Cheat Sheet

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Cultural and Religious Research Cheat Sheet

from EdStetzer.com by Ed Stetzer

For the past week, I’ve blogged quite a bit on statistics and their use. I’ve discussed the misuse of stats, how todiscern which stats are good and which are not, and even presented some new research on pastors’ views of the election and the use of stats.

You’ve responded with good questions and robust discussion (especially on my Facebook page). Through it all, I found a common theme in your tweets and comments: Where do I find accurate stats? While I can’t vouch for every research study conducted at every research firm under the sun, there are many trustworthy sources out there. You know their names, and I consider many of their leaders personal friends.

Since many of you use stats (as the research I presented yesterday showed) and want trustworthy ones to use, I thought I would share these stats I compiled for the Exponential Conference held this past April. These are as up-to-date as I could make them. But like any stat, they could be updated and changed. So before you use them, be discerning and verify them from the source listed in parentheses.

WORLD STATISTICS

• World population is over 7 billion people and growing at over 80 million per year (Population Media Center)
• Facebook has 1 billion monthly active users (Facebook)
• If the world were 100 people (100people.org)

  • 33 Christians, 22 Muslims, 14 Hindus, 7 Buddhists
  • 77 people would have a place to shelter them from the wind and the rain, but 23 would not
  • 1 would be dying of starvation, 15 would be undernourished, 21 would be overweight
  • 48 would live on less than $2 USD per day
  • 87 would have access to safe drinking water, 13 would use unimproved water

 

UNITED STATES STATISTICS

• 827,609 abortions in 2007 (most recent data) (CDC)
• Finance (endoftheamericandream.com)

  • Average household debt in the United States has now reached a level of 136% of average household income
  • Over the last decade, the number of Americans without health insurance has risen from about 38 million to about 52 million
  • Total U.S. credit card debt is more than 8 times larger o than it was just 30 years ago
  • Americans now owe more than $904 billion on student loans, which is a new all-time record high
  • 1.5 million Americans filed for bankruptcy in 2010. That represented the fourth yearly increase in bankruptcy filings in a row

• Medication (endoftheamericandream.com)

  • 11% of women take antidepressants (highest in the world)
  • Children are three times more likely to be prescribed antidepressants than Europe.

• Sexually Transmitted Disease (SimplexLove.com)

  • One in five people in the United States has an STD.
  • Two-thirds of all STDs occur in people 25 years of age or younger.
  • One in four new STD infections occurs in teenagers.

• We’re Number 1! or USA! USA! (endoftheamericandream.com)

  • Highest incarceration rate and the largest total prison population
  • Highest divorce rate in the world
  • Highest teen pregnancy rate
  • Most obese
  • More school shootings
  • Highest child abuse death rate
  • Produces more pornography
  • Gets more plastic surgery

PEOPLE ARE LOOKING (LifeWay Research)

• 88% of Americans agree “There is more to life than the physical world and society”
• 76% of Americans agree “There is an ultimate purpose and plan for every person’s life”
• 67% of Americans agree “A major priority in my life is finding my deeper purpose”
• 78% of Americans agree “It is important that I pursue a higher purpose and meaning for my life”

PEOPLE ARE BELIEVING (Pew Research Forum)

• 88% of American believe in God or a universal spirit
• 75% of Americans pray at least one a week

PEOPLE ARE WAITING

• 41% of the formerly churched said they would return to the local church if a friend or acquaintance invited them (LifeWay Research)
• 63% of Americans are willing to receive information about a local church from a family member (LifeWay Research)
• 56% are willing to receive it from friend or neighbor (LifeWay Research)

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Is Tithing an Iron-Clad Rule for Christians?

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Shel -At Mercy Church we let the debate rip between tithing and proportional giving.  I love what this pastor has written – if you are seeing 10% as an OT law and then taking the step of being stingy – you are missing the point.  You need to give for your benefit - and give off the top aka “first fruits” because your flesh and the devil will spend it all if you wait to give off the bottom of your check/resources.  FYI Anne and give 10% back every week to the local church we attend as a floor for our giving – so we are tithers and proportional/above and beyond + Alms and missions givers (we always give 10% to the church we attend and make sure it supports missions and sees it’s local area as a mission field – we believe in supporting the pastor-teacher role of Ephesians 4 as believers – we’ve always done this).  When I give to OTHER ministries I do not let them steal from my local church tithe – that is above and beyond giving.

 

I have NEVER regretted the tens of thousands we have given over the years. I HAVE regretted MANY other things we’ve spent money on.  Some of you spend more on your sunday food bill than you give to the church – that’s a definition of insanity.

Is Tithing an Iron-Clad Rule for Christians?

By Lillian Kwon , Christian Post Reporter
June 11, 2012|4:40 pm

The question remains for many Christians today: Does the Bible require believers to tithe (or give 10 percent of their income) just as God’s followers did in the Old Testament?

The short answer: yes and no, according to evangelical pastor J.D. Greear.

Pastor of The Summit Church in Durham, N.C., Greear has received many questions about whether or not tithing is biblical. The question, many times, goes back to “are we under law or under grace?”

Greear maintains that although “Jesus left us under NO PART of the law, not the tithe or anything else,” the idea of giving 10 percent of all that God gives remains a “good guide.”

“We are no longer under the theocratic nation state of Israel, but how God has set up his economy for His people has not changed,” he wrote in a blog post. “The law was given to help people live in the shalom of God. That’s what gives the law (principles like taking a Sabbath and the tithe) an enduring effect.”

Tithing, he stressed, is not an “iron-clad rule” for Christians as it was for Israelites. At the same time, the Gospel calls for a higher level of response to God’s laws, he argued.

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“[T]he law said ‘Don’t murder;’ yet, Jesus said the Gospel demanded we love our brother always and not hate him, not even our enemies,” he wrote. “So, if the law says ‘Give 10%,’ what kind of generosity does the Gospel call for? Would it not be GREATER generosity than 10%, just as the other commands were also intensified in Christ?”

A report released last year on the “state of church giving through 2009″ revealed that tithing among Protestants hit its lowest level in 41 years. Parishioners were only giving about 2.38 percent of their income to the church in 2009, down from 2.43 percent in 2008, according to the report by empty tomb, inc.

Also, a 2011 survey found that a majority of evangelical leaders do not believe the Bible requires tithing. The National Association of Evangelicals survey revealed that 58 percent do not believe tithing is required while 42 percent do.

Nevertheless, most of the NAE leaders said they give at least 10 percent of their income and maintained that Christians should give out of generosity.

Pete Wilson, senior pastor of Cross Point Church in Nashville, holds a similar view.

“If you ask me if you should tithe I would say. Probably not. I think you should actually be giving a larger proportion of your income away,” he stated in a May blog post.

“The grace of Jesus Christ should compel us to give more than the law ever required!”

In the same way, Greear believes that for “Gospel-touched people, tithing should never be the ceiling of their giving, but it should be the floor.”

And Christians should set aside that “tithe” first rather than last after other expenses. For him, the principle of “firstfruits” also means tithing pre-tax.

“[M]ost of us, even those with more than we need, will almost always feel like we can’t ‘afford the 10%.’ I never get to the end of my month with 10% of my income just laying around. That’s why I think the principle of firstfruits is so crucial to living under God,” he wrote. “Firstfruits should go to God, 10% is a great place to start.”

Recognizing that his arguments on tithing could come off as “self-serving” and “manipulative,” considering his role as a pastor, Greear urged those who are suspicious to give their tithe somewhere else.

“[I]f this bothers you, we don’t need your money. Give it somewhere else, but I want you to experience the joy of obedience and faith in this area,” he stressed.

In response to a reader who maintained that tithing ended at the cross and who further rejected the argument that those who don’t tithe are robbing God, Greear made one thing clear: “God doesn’t need our money or our worship or our commitment or anything else.”

“The church service is entirely about what God has given to us in Christ and how we freely respond to that out of our worship and sacrifice and money,” he stated. “God doesn’t need anythign (sic) that is offered in worship. We are the needy ones. So, our giving is to God, but in response to what God has done, and used to propagate even more of what God is giving to us.”

The Summit Church pastor gives more than 10 percent of his income to the church. While he and his wife started at 10 percent, he said they have yearly increased the percentage of what they give and now give “way above the tithe to our church, and then beyond that” to other ministries.

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Why Americans Spend Too Much

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December 6, 2011

The 2008 financial crisis made it clear: Americans save too little, spend too much and borrow excessively, says Princeton professor Sheldon Garon. In Western Europe and East Asia, governments aggressively encourage people to save through special savings institutions and savings campaigns.

Garon has just released a new book, Beyond Our Means: Why America Spends While the World Saves. He discussed his findings with NPR:

Do Americans spend more than people in Western Europe and Asia?

“They definitely do. You can look at consumption levels and control for purchasing power over the last several decades, and America is simply in a league of its own. The only people who come close are people in Britain, but they are about 85 percent of the level of American consumption. Germans, French and others are in the 70 percent range, Japanese even a little lower. So Americans spend like no one else.”

From ‘Tell Me More’

Were we savers before? The Benjamin Franklin admonition was to save money. Did we do that up until a certain point?

“Benjamin Franklin had more of an effect on Europe and Japan in the 19th century than he did on us. [Still,] we were good savers [in earlier times] where we had good savings institutions, like savings banks, in New England and the mid-Atlantic and Upper Midwest.

“But many people in America, particularly in the South and West, didn’t even have an accessible bank as late as 1910 in which they could save. We became very good savers during World War II and in the few decades after World War II.”

What happened in the more recent decades from the ’80s on out, where we seem to have greatly stepped up our use of credit cards and other kinds of debt?

“You’ve identified the 1980s as the right point — that’s when you have almost a perfect storm in terms of deregulating financial institutions that results in a tremendous outpouring of credit in various ways. The credit card industry is deregulated after about 1980. They can charge whatever they want on interest rates; they tend to then see their credit-card operations as cash cows; they tend to target riskier and riskier customers.

U.S. Household Saving Rate

Percent of disposable personal income

U.S. Household Saving Rate

Source: Bureau of Economic Analysis

Credit: NPR

“There’s also the creation of the home equity loan, which more or less did not exist before the mid-1980s. But the 1986 tax law reforms made home equity loans — the interest on them — tax deductible just like home mortgages. No other form of credit was tax deductible.

“So you had an explosion of home equity, and that resulted in lots of middle- to upper-income homeowners actually draining the equity out of their homes as they expanded their lines of credit. And we got to a point where, in so many different ways, Americans came to the conclusion: Why would you save when it was so easy to get credit?”

These habits we’ve developed — shop till you drop — it seems like it’s so much a part of our culture to overconsume that it’s got to be hard to reverse that direction. What has to happen to make us better savers?

“One thing is the unfortunate: Many households — millions of households — don’t have the means to get more credit and to spend more now, so that automatically is going to make people more cautious. But I think institutionally, we need to do several things. We need to improve the access of lower-income households to savings institutions.

“We just witnessed Bank of America and other banks trying to charge an extra fee on people with debit cards, particularly with low minimum balances. That tends to discourage people. [Among lower-income households] 25 percent of them are unbanked: They don’t have bank accounts.

“So we need to incentivize banks to create … small savers accounts [such as those in Europe]. They have a low or minimum balance, that have no fees, [and they] actually pay an interest rate that people can see. These can be subsidized by government working with banks — we can do that.

“We need to clearly do more to curb predatory lending, and I think we need to revise our tax laws, which right now incentivize really affluent taxpayers to contribute to their retirement accounts and to buy more and more housing, while not incentivizing lower- and middle-income households to put more of their money away in savings. In many countries, small savings accounts are tax exempt. Here we have the opposite — tax exempt advantages incentivize borrowing, not saving.

How optimistic are you that things could change?

“It’s a long shot, and as you have implied, there’s a lot of resistance out there. On the other hand, if we can’t even talk about the problem, if we can’t even talk about the benefits of some saving and we think that only consumer spending is good for the economy, then we’re not even getting to first base on this. We have to begin talking about the benefits of saving, and how we might restore a balance between saving and spending.”

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Black Friday Worship – Money is tougher subject than sex, gay marriage, war and abortion…

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This was my Facebook posting, but it’s really a blog post…

 

So every year my heart is torn.

If I buy nothing today (and there’s a good chance of this) will I get blamed for the slow economy? I know they are all trying to pin it on everyone but themselves up in washington? :-) happy black friday ya’ll.

 

Didn’t we just give thanks yesterday for blessings – including having enough?! I’d rather give to the church, our orphanage project in Ecuador, to children’s hospitals, etc. before I get more stuff. I tend to think it’s a moral duty to live on less and give 10% or more(!) of ones income – to make human flourishing a reality – and to free myself from the lies that another “hit” on the purchase drug will make me happy (it won’t the high only lasts about 5 minutes in the store and 5 minutes with the thing at home). Then I find I can enjoy the stuff of American privilege MORE than if I lived for the stuff. (how’s that for a consumption/balance/enough sermon?)

Jesus tells us that secondary pleasures of stuff is OK – IF it’s secondary to the work of the Kingdom

(READ THIS 3xs So you understand I am not promoting a false simplicity or affirming rampant consumption on the backs of the world’s impoverished – I believe the right way is usually a Third-way that admits the messiness and looks for creative solutions instead of demonizing the opposite end)

- supporting the local church -ministry (Paul makes this point clearly), teaching, and serving.  So I am not a nazi – blindly supporting the nation or the extremes.  Christians are not Gnostics – we affirm the goodness and fallen-ness of the creation at the same time.  That balance is only maintained by putting Jesus at the center.

  •  ‎6:19 “Do not accumulate for yourselves treasures on earth, where moth and rust destroy and where thieves break in and steal. 6:20 But accumulate for yourselves treasures in heaven, where moth and rust do not destroy, and thieves do not break in and steal. 6:21 For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also.” -Jesus (Matthew)
  • 12:30 For all the nations of the world pursue these things, and your Father knows that you need them. 12:31 Instead, pursue his kingdom, and these things will be given to you as well. -Jesus (Luke)

 

Herb Miller reminds us: What Is Christian Stewardship?

The short answer: Christian stewardship is the faithful management of all that God gives.

A longer answer: Christian stewardship is gratefully, faithfully, systematically, and proportionally managing all of our time, ability, and financial resources so that God can use them to transform human life spiritually, help hurting people, and reach out to others with Christ’s redeeming love.

In defining the spiritual connection between money and our relationship with God, the Apostle Paul summarizes stewardship like this:

  •  You will be enriched in every way for your great generosity, which will produce thanksgiving to God through us; for the rendering of this ministry not only supplies the needs of the saints but also overflows in many thanksgivings to God. Through the testing of this ministry, you glorify God by your obedience to the confession of the gospel of Christ and by the generosity of your sharing with them and with all others (2 Corinthians 9:11-13).

 Note the twin goals in Paul’s lengthy definition: (1) helping people grow spiritually through their financial giving and (2) providing sufficient resources for the Church’s mission and ministries.

Jesus summed up the spiritual connection between money and God this way: “Where your treasure is, there will your heart be also (Luke 12:34).” That verse succinctly defines Christian stewardship: treasure management that helps people to escape the trap of selfishness by keeping their hearts spiritually focused on God.

Each of us makes one of two choices in life:

We either become emotionally attached to our money or we become emotionally attached to the God who gives us our money.

Although we often hope to do both, in our heart we know that cannot happen. Financial stewardship helps us to overcome the temptation to break the First Commandment and put a false idol first, ahead of the God who revealed Himself in Jesus Christ.

The faithful management of everything God gives them helps the givers grow spiritually by committing a percentage of their income to God’s work through their congregation.

 

 

New Options For Black Friday Beyond The Lib/Con Divide?

Wonder how a Black Friday Healing, Exorcism and Generosity service would go over?

Along with an altar/extended prayer time for people to take account – literally write down – all the stuff they have.  What they have given/what they have received and how we can stimulate the economy through money used differently than more stuff? E.g. supporting innovative companies focused on flourishing?  supporting missions better? supporting the work of MCC?

I think we could do this BEFORE one goes shopping.  Think how that would honor and challenge the culture we live in (we are in a consumer culture) – but put it under the Lordship of Jesus Christ?

Money is tougher subject than sex, gay marriage, war and abortion… check yourself before you wreck and wreak…

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Personal Incomes Up in SD…Be Thankful!

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Shel Boese / Shelby Boese, Corey reposted some stats that just came out with a little analysis…I might add it seems the fear mongering “end of the world” talk is part of the human psyche.  There are always secular and religious apocalyptic theories and we tend to latch on to them for various purposes.

Political, economic, religious, social…have you examined your fear buttons lately in light of the economic apocalptic theories?

Jesus promises that if we center on down in Him in relationship and His teachings we need not be paralyzed or driven by hate or fear.  That His Spirit helps us transcend the brokenness within that is driven by fear and hate.  Therefore the more “heavenly minded” we become the more grittier and joyful and engaged we can be in “real life” without dehumanizing our way to goals that do not ultimately satisfy nor bring security.

Righteousness (right peace-making relationships with God and each other), peace (soundness of mind not that re-orders our emotions), and joy (an all consuming sense of delight in that which is a gift- everything) are promised as we seek the Kingdom of God now in anticipation of a re-creation/new creation one day.

 

OK so ….

Hey, Sioux Falls! Get your personal income growth back in gear! According to the latest data from the Bureau of Economic Analysis, personal income in the Sioux Falls metro area (Minnehaha, McCook, Turner, and Lincoln counties) grew 1.6% in 2010, from $9.47 billion to $9.62 billion. That’s positive, but so was the growth rate in 362 of the country’s 366 metro areas. Around the country, the average personal income growth rate in the big metros was 2.9%. Personal income grew in every metro but four (Grand Junction, CO; Las Vegas-Paradise, NV; Reno-Sparks, NV; and Carson City, NV).

Sioux Falls actually improved over its 2009 personal income growth rate of 0.3%, a year when only 124 metros posted positive numbers in that column. But now with everyone else growing, 2010′s slow and steady performance ranks Sioux Falls just 335th out of the 366 metros.

Personal Income Growth, 2009-2010, Metros by Quintile | Bureau of Economic Analysis

Just down the road, the Sioux City metro enjoyed a good bounce back from a rough 2009. Our Iowegian/Dakota Dunesian friends spent 2009 losing 1.4% of their personal income. In 2010, they cranked up their personal income 3.2%

Meanwhile, across the other river, the Rapid City metro (Pennington and Meade) saw a similar turnaround. It rose from from 0.3% shrinkage in personal income in 2009 to 3.2% growth in 2010. That’s a climb from $4.66 billion to $4.81 billion.

Set growth aside and look at the raw dollar figures. The total personal income in South Dakota in 2010 was $31.6 billion. Out of every $100 made in South Dakota last year, $30.45 was made in the Sioux Falls metro, while $15.21 was made in the Rapid City metro. Nearly half of our state wealth is generated in those two metro areas.

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U.S. Alliance Church Surprises French Church Plant

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U.S. Alliance Church Surprises French Church Plant

February 16, 2011

wp-images1By Brad Reynolds, serving in France

It was a surprise for us to learn at the end of January, mid-way through our home assignment year, that our young church plant in southwestern France had a grand total of 67 euros ($97) in the bank account. Due to recent renovations on the rented facility that we use for worship and Sunday school, the final bills had depleted the account that normally covers all of our costs. Facing invoices of more than 3,500 euros ($4,700) due in a week, the church board had no idea how they would come up with the funds. From the very outset of this church plant, the first church to be established in this community in more than 700 years, God had been teaching us to live and walk entirely by faith. This would be one of the greatest challenges we had faced.

The weekend prior to receiving this news, Tina and I had spoken at Risen King Alliance Church in New City, New York, where several members of the congregation had given us words of encouragement from the Lord at the conclusion of the service. One member told us that she had received a picture of trucks loaded with provisions, waiting in a warehouse and ready to leave for our church. She believed that this was God’s encouragement to us that all that was needed to purchase our rented facility would be provided. A few days later, we learned of the church’s need.

Requesting prayer from those who support us, Tina and I were waiting for God’s answer as we left for a special tour of two churches in the South Pacific District, leaving our regular tour of Metropolitan District churches. During our time in Arizona, we learned that on the last Sunday of January, the French church had received one-fourth of the needed amount in the offering and another member had promised a gift that would cover another fourth of the amount. But where would the rest of the funds come from to pay the rent and other bills?

While traveling to the second church, we told Pastor Steve Redden of Cross Point Church in Murrieta, California, about how God was teaching our church to live and walk by faith and how the members were excitedly waiting to see how the final amount would come in. At that point, Pastor Redden told us that we could phone our church and tell them not to worry because Cross Point would take care of the rest. He said that as a young Alliance congregation, the Lord had met all of their needs and that they had a heart for other church-planting situations. He said that they were “a warehouse church” because they meet in a space that was used in the past for a small business. We were so excited and touched by the generosity of this church that we had never even visited.

Later we realized that this was the picture that our friend had received, a warehouse with all of the provisions that we needed-the trucks just waiting to leave. God had provided once again as we waited in faith and trust.

On Sunday morning, Pastor Redden told his congregation about the gift that had been given in their name. Spontaneous applause filled the room. On the other side of the ocean, EPI members had learned of God’s provision and were deeply touched by their caring Father and the partnership of the Alliance family. Tina and I believe this is one more expression of what it means to “live the call together.”

Learn More

Check out our Alliance work in France.

What You Can Do

Praise the Lord for this pioneer ministry in Léguevin. Pray that all those who hear the life-changing message of the gospel in this house of prayer will receive Him as Savior.

Help keep Alliance workers such as Brad and Tina on the field.

Donate now to Alliance Great Commission Ministries.

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